A Logical Analysis of the Manwich Commercial Song:

You don’t have to be a man to love Manwich

Accepted: Men’s palates have not been demonstrated to be different from all other palates (see A Logical Analysis of the argument ‘Real men don’t eat quiche’)

You don’t have to be a witch either – it’s true

Accepted on multiple grounds:

1. The ‘Wich argument: It is not a Man-witch, it is a Manwich, presumably a play on Sandwich, which is based on the Earl of Sandwich who was so dissolute in his gambling ways that he did not want to leave the gambling table to eat at a different table, so he ordered that a meal of meat be placed betwixt two slices of bread so that he could continue to squander his money on a fuller stomach.
2. The Witch argument: Presumably if witches were the sole market for Manwich, the market would be small indeed as most witches are fictional or definitely don’t want to be advertizing the fact lest Sarah Palin’s minister hunt them down.

You just have to love a hot tasty dinner

Disregarding the foodstuff itself, a very inclusive statement: excludes only people who live in hot climates and prefer not to eat hot (temperature-wise) foods, people who don’t eat dinner, and perhaps people with general food aversion (tasty means delicious – who doesn’t like delicious – people with general food aversion). This leaves a large pool of people.

And getting some of that dinner on you.

With this statement, Manwich loses most of the civilized audience. A love of slovenliness is a necessity for love of the Manwich? The analyst is disgusted.